I keep thinking that if I just push a little harder, work a little smoother, that I can do more than I can.

I signed up for Trigonometry this semester. And everything else started falling down around me. And the nightmares started showing up nightly.

I get frustrated, it’s all the little things I can’t keep up with. Paperwork and forms to fill out and paperwork to send off there and over there and fax over there. Groceries to buy. Post offices to deal with. Dishes to do and a house to clean. Little things.

Yet if I don’t get these little things done they snowball.

I’ve decided that there are things I could do and things I should do.

Some of the things that I should do are:

Visit my grandma, even if she doesn’t know who I am and cries the entire time I’m there.

Buy groceries regularly so I can eat healthy and keep my blood sugar level.

Exercise. Find a way to exercise that I can do consistently.

Pay my bills on time.

Stay in contact with my friends, including visiting occasionally and going out.

Do my laundry regularly.

Learn and practice meditation and grounding. I can disassociate with no prompting whatsoever, what I can’t do is ground myself and be wherever it is I am instead of disassociating.

Out of bandwidth. More later.